“Food poisoning”

best of super

Three months into our relationship and we had both gotten a bad case of food poisoning and it was coming out both ends. He got better before I did, but one day we were driving home and I asked him to pull over so I could vomit. He had to pull over three other times during the drive. On the last time, 50 feet from my apartment, I had to get out and vomit…I also pooped my pants. I knew it was love when he set down a shirt for me to sit on and let me get back into his car.


Postscript : We’ve been married almost a year.

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“Food made music”

best of super

She’d said good food made music inside her head, and sometimes when she ate something good she’d swing her fingers like an orchestra conductor’s wand. We had two friends over, one of whom had brought a pet dog. I saw her in the kitchen preparing a snack tray, and the dog went in to investigate. She popped a snack in her mouth and swung her fingers to the music. Then she popped a snack in the dog’s mouth and swung her fingers in front of the dog’s nose so he could hear the music.


Postscript: We’ve been married 7 years now.

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“Elephant shoe”

best of strange

We were dating for a few months when he said “elephant shoe” to me at a friend’s barbecue. I was lost and had no idea what it meant. So I nervously laughed it off. One of my friends overheard our conversation, shook his head and said, “He said, ‘I love you!’ ” The whole time he was smiling and looking at me. (But he did yell at my friend for ruining the moment.)


Postscript: It lasted two years. I left him because I thought he stopped loving me. It turns out, he never did. He continued to be my Superman and rock, even after the breakup.

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“The grubby kitchen floor”

best of sweet

My dog had died. I was crying in the kitchen when, out of the blue, my boyfriend asked me, “Do you want to roll on the floor?” And you know, strangely I did. So we both got onto the grubby kitchen floor and just kinda rolled around and over each other. And I felt a million times better.


Postscript: There were some really amazing moments but we were both disasters and it didn’t last.

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“Russian accent”

best of super

I felt sorry for the one lonely fish in the aquarium of my dentist’s waiting room. The handsome guy sitting across from me saw my fleeting expression of pity for the fish and said (in a subtle Russian accent) “She’s sad, no?”


Postscript: He asked me to marry him after the first time I beat him in a game of chess.

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“Shape of a heart”

best of super

A guy I was dating emailed me a photo of his hands forming the shape of a heart while on a business trip in Asia.


Postscript: I stupidly left the guy to go back to an ex-boyfriend, which I still regret.

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“I might die”

best of surprising

After a day on the coast, we drove back in a downpour as she took corners too quickly on a winding highway. Led Zeppelin’s “Kashmir” started to play on a static-fuzzed radio and I thought, “I’m in love with this girl and I might die.”


Postscript: She didn’t actually kill me and we dated for three years. The breakup, however, nearly killed me.

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